Looking your best is not the same as fearing your age — Sharon Pasion Vinluan

On October 12, it is crucial to understand the difference between societal expectations and personal motivation when discussing ageing and aesthetic self-care. Public opinion often confuses personal grooming and wellness practices with age-related anxieties, when in reality, the intent behind these actions can be vastly different.

While some people may feel compelled to look younger, others prioritize self-respect, personal autonomy, and overall well-being. The article discusses how personal choices in appearance can be driven by a desire to maintain a sense of self rather than a fear of physical decline. The author states that ageing should not come with a prescribed appearance, and no one should be made to feel ashamed of grey hair, wrinkles, or changing bodies.

However, they also acknowledge the other side of the conversation, where looking polished, youthful, stylish, or well-groomed may not be about denying age at all, but rather a matter of self-respect. The distinction between societal pressure and personal choice is essential, as the intention behind an action can vary greatly even if the outcome appears the same.

The author has never believed that caring about appearance is automatically shallow, as there is a deeply personal aspect to how we present ourselves. For many, taking care of oneself, whether through exercise, skincare, or fashion, is a way to maintain a sense of self and personal agency against societal expectations. The article further highlights the double standards women often face regarding age and appearance.

If a woman lets her hair turn grey, she may be considered old; if she colours it, she might be accused of trying too hard to look young. The author emphasizes that these contradictory judgments create lose-lose situations for individuals, regardless of their choices. To truly reclaim personal autonomy, we must deconstruct societal expectations surrounding ageing and allow individuals to embrace their own choices without judgement.

This includes accepting that ageing can look different for everyone, and there is no one "right" way to look. Ultimately, the author argues that the real issue lies in allowing others to dictate how ageing should look, and instead, we should embrace the choices that make us feel most like ourselves, whether that means letting nature take its course or continuing to groom, dress, exercise, and care for ourselves.