Are screens making us lonelier?

Screen use has become a central part of our lives, reshaping the nature of human relationships. Professor Vidar Halldórsson, a sociologist at the University of Iceland, argues in his new book that the migration of social life to digital platforms has altered more than just the way we communicate; it has changed the very nature of human interaction itself.

Relationships are no longer always one-to-one, as they increasingly become mediated by devices, platforms, or algorithms that determine what we see and how we respond. While it is true that we now send more messages, see our friends’ pictures throughout the day, and receive constant notifications, these forms of contact do not necessarily lead to greater human closeness.

In-person conversations, where we can see facial expressions, hear voices, and sense hesitation and emotion, seem to foster a deeper sense of connection than digital interactions. Neuroscience research shows that during face-to-face conversations, two people's brains may become synchronised, creating a phenomenon known as 'interpersonal neural synchrony'.

This synchronization does not occur to the same degree in screen-based communication. While digital conversations still hold value, they lack the richer mix of sensory and social cues present during in-person interactions. When we communicate through screens, we miss out on reading facial expressions, body language, posture, gaze, tone of voice, and rhythm – elements that help us understand others better.

In essence, face-to-face interactions provide a more holistic experience that strengthens trust, belonging, and our sense of connection. In contrast, screen-based communication is often described as low in social cues. Messages lack the subtle signals conveyed by facial expressions and body language, making it easier for tone to be misunderstood or for digital arguments to seem harsher than in-person conversations.

Additionally, factors such as smell and physical proximity, which have traditionally played a role in human communication, are absent in digital interactions. This loss of non-verbal cues may help explain why misunderstandings occur more frequently in text-based communication and why digital disagreements can feel more intense than those that arise in person.

Moreover, excessive or addictive social media use has been linked to declines in some aspects of our ability to take others' perspectives and understand their emotions. However, these associations do not definitively prove a direct causal relationship. The effects of this digital shift extend beyond friendships and family relationships, impacting even brief, passing encounters.

Sociologist Erving Goffman studied seemingly ordinary details of daily life, such as greeting a neighbour, exchanging words in a queue, or smiling at someone on public transport. These small social rituals form part of our daily lives. The loss of face-to-face interactions may diminish the richness of these encounters, altering the meaning of human relationships in the digital age.