Kindness isn’t always what it seems: The psychology of women’s competitive altruism

A recent study published in Frontiers in Psychology reveals that some women may employ kindness and generosity strategically to gain an advantage over rivals, a tendency linked to manipulative personality traits and lower agreeableness. Led by Maryanne Fisher, a Santamarian Research Chair at Saint Mary’s University, the research explores the concept of competitive altruism, which refers to the idea that people give resources or help others to boost their social standing and reputation.

Previous research primarily focused on men, but Fisher's study aimed to investigate female social dynamics, where indirect competition—such as gossip, exclusion, and reputation management—often prevails over overt displays of generosity.

Fisher and her colleagues developed the Competitive Altruism Survey to measure the strategic use of kindness and recruited 103 heterosexual cisgender women aged 18 to 45 from the UK, US, and Canada. The survey assessed participants' behavior toward other women and men, as well as their personality traits, including Machiavellianism, agreeableness, extraversion, conscientiousness, and neuroticism.

The findings revealed a strong positive association between competitive altruism and Machiavellianism, suggesting that women who engage in strategic kindness are more likely to have a manipulative, self-interested approach to social interactions.

Additionally, competitive altruism was negatively associated with agreeableness, a trait linked to genuine warmth and cooperative sincerity. The study also found that neuroticism was linked to the anxiety and frustration associated with strategic kindness, rather than the act itself. However, the overall average score on the survey was below the neutral midpoint, indicating that women, on average, leaned towards disagreeing with the strategic statements.

While the study provides insights into how women may use kindness as a competitive tool, further research is needed to determine its prevalence and effectiveness in daily life.