‘I don’t have any friends’: why do young people today have fewer mates?

A growing trend among young people in the UK is the increasing number of those who report having no close friends. Tess Lavanda, a 22-year-old YouTuber, has gained significant attention with her video "I don’t have any friends," which has garnered over half a million views since its posting a month ago. She joins a growing number of individuals, primarily teenagers and young adults, who openly discuss their struggles with loneliness and lack of friendships.

Several factors contribute to this phenomenon, including social media, mental health issues, the COVID-19 pandemic, and financial instability. In a recent study by the Institute for Public Policy Research, the number of young people in England without any close friends has surged fivefold since 2014, now accounting for one in 20 individuals. In addition to this, a growing percentage of those who do have friends express dissatisfaction with the friendships they share.

Pamela Qualter, a leading expert on child and adolescent loneliness, acknowledges that the reason behind this growing trend is multifaceted. She attributes the issue to the decline in simple social interactions, the rise of remote work, and the limited availability of low-cost social spaces for young people to connect. However, she emphasizes that there is limited evidence suggesting that young people are actually getting more lonely.

Instead, she suggests that the expectations surrounding friendships may have evolved, and those with fewer close friends may be content with this change.

Another significant factor is the nature of modern friendships, often formed through social media and group chats, which can quickly devolve into bullying and harassment, leading to increased isolation and withdrawal. Financial constraints also play a role, with some young people unable to afford transportation to socialize or navigate crowded spaces due to anxiety brought on by the pandemic.

Despite the challenges, Lavanda and others like her believe that speaking openly about their experiences helps to normalize the issue and provides comfort to others who may be feeling similarly alone. They advocate for honesty and openness about loneliness, recognizing that the topic deserves more attention and support.