Why we give flowers to those in grief – or buy them for ourselves when we’re sad
You can buy yourself flowers.
During his excavation at the Shanidar Cave in present-day Kurdistan, American archaeologist Ralph Solecki discovered burial sites with pollen and flower fragments, dating back roughly 60,000 years. These floral remnants suggested that Neanderthals might have used flowers to honor their deceased, providing comfort for various reasons – biological, psychological, cultural, sensory, and symbolic.
Flowers have been a source of solace throughout history, prompting the question: why do we give flowers to those in grief, or to ourselves when feeling sad?
Flowers can convey comfort when words fall short. At times of mourning, a bouquet or bunch of cut flowers can be offered without the pressure of engaging in a potentially uncomfortable, awkward, or unnerving conversation. The texture, color, fragrance, shape, formation, and variations of flowers stimulate or soothe our senses, elevating our mood. Flowers embrace the cycle of life and symbolize life affirmation, reminding us that death has its place within nature's order.
Meanings of flowers and death differ across cultures. In Japan, chrysanthemums symbolize death and reincarnation and are often placed in deceased individuals' coffins. In Chinese culture, white and yellow chrysanthemums are sent to the family of the deceased, while other colors are avoided. In contrast, in the United States, chrysanthemums signify truth and purity and are used to honor individuals who have lived a full life.
In France, Germany, Italy, and Malta, chrysanthemums are given solely to the deceased. Indigenous Australian peoples incorporate native plants, leaves, and flowers into their holistic mourning customs and healing practices during Sorry Business.
Grief is mentally and physically exhausting, often leading to psychological fatigue, concentration difficulties, and a reduced capacity for mental engagement. Attention Restorative Theory posits that spending time in nature can alleviate mental fatigue and improve concentration. Thus, a vase or container of cut flowers can bring calm consolation and help alleviate somber times.
Acknowledging and honoring the deceased while maintaining connections with the living is essential for coping with grief. Giving flowers to someone who is grieving can foster a nurturing presence and connection with the deceased loved one, promoting the continuity of life for those still around.
The act of choosing, picking, or purchasing cut flowers for oneself, regardless of the circumstance, demonstrates self-compassion and self-care. A single flower or a bunch of cut flowers transforms a personal space into a space of caring worthiness, acknowledging kindness toward oneself. Cut flowers can represent various meanings – pleasure, joy, bliss, happiness, contentment, celebration, and gratification, even during challenging times.
These botanical gifts provide a tangible reminder that we are connected to life and others, offering comfort and support during stressful periods. Ultimately, flowers symbolize life's fragility while offering beauty, hope, and a reminder of our ongoing love, gratitude, memory, and appreciation.
Written by urgent.news from The Conversation AU's reporting — not their text. Machine-written — may contain errors; check the original before relying on it.
