‘Bob and Van’

In the author's childhood, she lived next to Bob and his wife, a kind and reserved older couple who were religious and often discussed Jesus. Bob provided assistance to the author's mom after their father passed away. During a small fire on the family's deck, it was Bob who the author's mom called for help, not the fire department.

After moving away, the author later encountered Van, a deeply kind, generous, and friendly neighbor who would often mow their lawn or shovel their snow without being asked. As Van's mobility declined, the author was also able to help him in return. Unfortunately, both Bob and Van passed away before the author discovered their political beliefs.

The author reflects on the hypothetical situation of encountering neighbors with political views that they consider unacceptable and unforgivable. She wonders if it would be acceptable to still have dinner at their house, shovel their snow, or even greet them outside. The author also questions whether they should face condemnation for supporting or associating with them in non-political contexts, and if they should publicly condemn those neighbors themselves.

The author emphasizes that privilege and power dynamics play a significant role in this situation, but she does not wish to associate with any community that insists on either condoning or condemning individuals based on their political views. She remembers a time when their town coffee shop was simply a place to gather with friends, without any public shaming for visiting due to the owners' behavior.

The author compares this to how casual work friends were treated, without expecting them to take positions on complex global conflicts. In that environment, conversations revolved around weather and TV shows, and sometimes a beer after work. This experience led the author to learn the word "SHIT!" somewhere on Bob's wall, perhaps a quote from an influential political dissenter about not casting the first stone.