Marmots facing money troubles turn to OnlyFans

Marmots, those plump ground-dwelling squirrels, have become the newest sensation on the adult platform OnlyFans. This unexpected trend is the result of the efforts of Dr. Daniel Blumstein, a Colorado-based biologist leading a long-running field study on marmots. Blumstein was concerned about the financial future of his project after federal funding to universities was reduced.

In a bid to keep their study afloat, he launched an OnlyFans account and began posting uncensored content featuring the rodents in all their natural glory. The videos, which depict marmots scurrying around and popping out of their burrows, have generated over $5,000 so far. After OnlyFans takes its cut, the UCLA-affiliated Rocky Mountain Biological Laboratory in Colorado will receive approximately $4,000.

The Marmot Project, which has been running for over 60 years, is the second-longest study of individually identified mammals in the world, after Jane Goodall's chimpanzee research in Tanzania. The yellow-bellied marmot, one of the 15 recognized species of marmot found in the Northern Hemisphere, is the focus of this long-term research.

While the project may not be able to avoid spending cuts through OnlyFans, Blumstein believes raising awareness about their work is crucial. The idea for OnlyFans came to him while he was waiting in a meadow for marmots to emerge from their burrows. Inspired by a TV show he watched featuring a woman starting an OnlyFans account as a single mother, Blumstein thought, "Marmots got money troubles, maybe we should do something a little risqué."

He brought the idea to his lab students, who helped him set up the account, OnlyMarms. However, he faced a small obstacle when he had to upload a photo of his driver's license to verify his identity, as the platform did not match the profile photo of a marmot. After a quick email exchange, they were able to start posting videos.

OnlyMarms offers users a glimpse into the Rocky Mountain marmots' natural habitat, where they can observe their less sociable nature and the aging female marmots becoming grumpier. One video features a female chasing away a male who got too comfortable in her burrow, while another dubbing her "the queen of the town" as she basks in the sun.

The lab avoids giving their subjects human-sounding names to prevent bias in their research, instead marking them with dye and labeling them with names like "Dans Hat," "Open Kite," and "Citroën." In addition to OnlyMarms, the lab has launched Fat Marmot Week, inspired by Fat Bear Week. During this event, the public can vote for their favorite rotund rodent in a bracket-style tournament at the end of August.

While this might seem like mere fun and games, Blumstein emphasizes that it's a serious competition against nature for the marmots to gain enough fat to survive the long, cold winter.