‘SNL’ Cold Open: Jensen Huang, Tech CEOs Get a Crash Course in Female Spies

Disgraced former NVIDIA President Jensen Huang, now portrayed by Bowen Yang, joined other prominent tech CEOs at the opening of tonight's "Saturday Night Live" episode to warn them against being deceived by foreign spies. Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg, Tesla CEO Elon Musk, Palantir chairman Peter Thiel, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman, and Anthropic CEO Dario Amodei all attended the session.

CIA official John Mulaney took charge, bluntly informing the men that "America needs you to learn the difference between a woman who would actually want to have sex with you and a woman who is clearly a spy." Palantir's Thiel argued that technology had never let the CEOs down, listing recent mishaps such as Microsoft Outlook going dark.

Mulaney, however, had some sympathy for the executives, pointing out their unusual position of wealth and power. Using Venn diagrams, Mulaney highlighted the lack of overlap between beautiful women and the gathered tech CEOs' interests and personalities, concluding that if someone is both, they are a spy. Huang, played by Yang, entered the scene to drive home the point, telling the CEOs "Fellas, don’t be like me. Remember, women don’t like guys like us. That’s how we became guys like us."