How groomers operate - why victims become trapped

In a three-year investigation of entertainer and children's author David Walliams, ITV News and The Guardian have found allegations that date back to 2003. The study reveals that victims of grooming often feel trapped, making it difficult to understand why they did not take action. Linguistic research on grooming identifies 14 recurring moves used by offenders, such as building rapport, assessing risk, escalating sexual topics, and planning offline meetings.

These moves overlap and repeat, with no typical structure, indicating that offenders tailor their grooming styles to their individual goals and the person they are talking to. Rapport-building and trust development are key strategies used to manipulate victims and make them feel special. Offenders also use language that shifts responsibility onto the target, such as asking about sexual preferences and using phrases like "how far do you want to go."

Another tactic is the "mitigating lol," which reduces the impact of sexual questions by implying playfulness. The goal of grooming is to create compliance and secrecy, not to compromise the victim's character. Understanding these strategies can help caregivers, educators, and children recognize grooming earlier and shift the focus from the victim's actions to those of the offender.