Man spends 35 years collecting corporate waffle, turns it into an app

Dave Doty, an executive with over 30 years of experience in corporate meetings, has spent more than 10,000 meetings collecting corporate jargon. His life's work has been turned into an app called Executive Eightball, which generates 270 million unique variations of corporate buzzwords and clichés. The app, available on both iPhone and Android platforms, aims to help users sound convincingly corporate while saying little to nothing.

Doty's creation is described as the result of a "Dilbert and George Costanza love child." Among the phrases generated by the app are "We must dashboard the outputs to enable us to focus on operational directives and break the paradigm" and "Drive to cross-functional synergies so we can reengineer the organization and unleash shareholder value."

Doty claims the app can produce approximately 270 million unique sentences in 15 languages, allowing workers worldwide to participate in meetings without the need for actual ideas. The app offers a free version with ads and limited use, as well as a paid version that unlocks all features for $0.99. Doty considers Executive Eightball his greatest lifetime contribution to society, noting that it provides a productive use for the time wasted in meetings.