The People Who Outsource Emotional Labor to AI

Franky, a middle-aged woman from the mid-Atlantic region, faced a challenging situation when her aunt sent her yet another emotionally charged message. Instead of responding with hostility, Franky turned to AI technology for assistance. She asked the program to generate a less confrontational reply, resulting in a message that conveyed respect and a desire for mature communication.

Franky is among a growing number of individuals who use AI programs like ChatGPT and Claude to help them navigate difficult conversations with family members they don't necessarily want to maintain close ties with, such as ex-spouses or in-laws. These individuals often use AI to interpret messages they receive and craft their own responses, effectively outsourcing emotional labor to the technology.

By allowing AI to handle the emotional aspect of communication, these individuals can maintain harmony in their relationships without constantly worrying about how to express themselves perfectly. One of the primary benefits of using AI in this way is that it helps people remove emotions from conversations, leading to calmer exchanges and a higher chance of resolution.

Many of the people interviewed for this report had specific reasons for employing AI in their interactions with difficult family members. Some were not native English speakers, struggling with misunderstandings, while others lacked experience in writing or expressing themselves effectively in text-based conversations. Ultimately, AI can help individuals convey their thoughts in a more neutral, measured tone, potentially improving their relationships and reducing the likelihood of conflict.

Importantly, many of these individuals don't mind if their ex-partners discover their use of AI, as they believe the technology has improved their co-parenting relationship and, in some cases, even shared the strategy with their clients in their therapy work.