I always thought I was unattractive. Seeing a photo from 49 years ago changed how I view myself.
I've always compared myself to others and felt unattractive. When a friend showed me a photo from 49 years ago, I realized I was wrong.
The author recently came across an old photograph of herself taken nearly 50 years ago, and it dramatically altered her self-perception. Courtesy of Amy Abbott An old friend had shared a picture of the author when she was a bridesmaid in a wedding that took place almost half a century ago. At first, the author was shocked and unsure if it was her.
As a teenager, especially in her teens, the author struggled with low self-confidence. The photo revealed a beautiful young girl. Earlier this summer, an old high school friend and her husband, whom the author hadn't seen for forty years, stopped by on their way back from northern Indiana to their home in Atlanta. The author was a bridesmaid in their wedding 49 years prior.
When the author's friend shared a picture of her at 20 in a light-blue gown, proceeding into the wedding ceremony at their hometown's United Methodist Church, it was a lightning bolt for her. Growing up, the author constantly compared herself to others, often seeing herself as inferior. As a young girl, she was slightly overweight, had jet-black hair that didn't match her pale skin, and was self-conscious about her nose.
The author compared herself to the attractive, blonde cheerleaders she worked with at a drive-in during her teens. Her mother was shorter and wore minimal makeup, while the author had a "McVay nose" common in her family. The author had no sisters to learn from, and fashion magazines defined beauty for her. Her hair was thick and wavy, which she often styled with perms, resulting in a look similar to a brunette Mamie Eisenhower.
The author, seen here with her family as a young girl, had always seen herself as unattractive. Despite having a loving family and finding the love of her life in college, the author felt unattractive throughout her life. Even on her wedding day, she was intimidated by the appearance of her bridesmaids. The author's perspective changed when she saw the old photo, which revealed she was indeed a cute little girl.
Now 69, she has accepted her wrinkles as part of growing older, but still loves her white hair, which she quit coloring years ago.
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