Jimmy Fallon Roasts Seahawks and Patriots Players’ Faces After Super Bowl Rematch

On the opening night of the 2026-2027 NFL season, a Super Bowl rematch took place between the Seattle Seahawks and New England Patriots. To mark the occasion, comedian Jimmy Fallon roasted both teams during his monologue on Wednesday night. Fallon began by joking that the teams would likely be renamed "American Patriots" and "Seattle Americans" following the insistence of the president on renaming places that evoke other countries.

He then turned his attention to the players, using a common format where he roasts the athletes' comments.

For the Seahawks, Fallon quoted quarterback Sam Darnold saying, "I can't wait to defend our title this season. Go team." He then showed a photo of Alijah Vera-Tucker from the Patriots and joked, "Did somebody say goatee? Sorry, I thought you were talking about me. Anyway, we're going to beat these punchable geeks." The host continued this pattern with Milton Williams from the Patriots, who said, "Did somebody say pinchable cheeks?

Sorry, thought you're talking about me," and Darius Muasau, who joked, "Did somebody say the gummy just hit?"

Fallon continued to mock several more players on each team, until he ended the bit with Patriots safety Brenden Schooler saying, "we got this, rock and roll," and Patriots legend Rob Gronkowski joking, "Did somebody say Gronk get ball?!" The full bit can be viewed in the video above.