Keep the Feedback You Disagreed With

When you receive feedback you disagree with, it's wise not to discard it immediately. Everyone encounters such moments, where someone suggests you're too blunt, too slow, or overly detailed. After considering the feedback, you might conclude it's mistaken. Perhaps they misjudged you, or they were measuring you against certain standards.

You may have been off your best game that day, or it could be something they heard secondhand. So, it's okay to set it aside for now. However, don't erase it from your records. Write it down, add a date, and revisit it in six months. There are two reasons for this. First, not every feedback is accurate. Second, initial feedback can provide valuable insights.

When you return to the note after six months, you'll likely have concrete examples to support it. In those six months, you've had more opportunities to observe whether the feedback was correct. Often, what initially seemed wrong will turn out to be right, and vice versa. Some feedback might prove entirely unfounded after multiple readings.

But having examined it multiple times, with evidence instead of just defensiveness, gives you a stronger position. Also, pay attention to feedback that appears repeatedly from different people. A single note from one person might be dismissed easily, but the same note from multiple sources over time is a consistent measurement rather than a subjective opinion. The feedback you argued with is usually the most worthwhile to revisit.