You want a baby. Is it ethical to choose surrogacy?

Dear Reader,

In her own words, the querent explains that she is a woman in her 30s who wants to become a parent but suffers from a health condition that makes pregnancy difficult, uncomfortable, and potentially disfiguring. Despite being able to afford a reputable surrogate, surrogacy is often regarded as unethical, and the querent fears being judged by friends and family.

The expert addresses the ethical concerns surrounding surrogacy, noting that there are indeed valid questions to be raised about the practice. However, she emphasizes that stigmas such as the notion that it is "wrong" or "unwomanly" to not want to have a biological child are rooted in patriarchal constructs. The expert then distinguishes between two types of surrogacy: commercial surrogacy, which involves payment, and altruistic surrogacy, where the surrogate does it out of love.

The former is fraught with concerns about commodification and exploitation, while the latter avoids most of these issues.

The expert further emphasizes the importance of the surrogate's location. While surrogacy in countries like Georgia, Ukraine, and Cyprus is often exploitative, those in the US are less likely to be coerced due to the generally middle-class status of American surrogates. Moreover, she asserts that people yearning for biological children may have a qualified right to have one, provided it meets criteria such as informed consent.

Ultimately, the expert concludes that while surrogacy can be ethically justifiable in some instances, the querent's situation is more complex. She encourages the querent to consider her unique circumstances and the potential consequences of her decision.