The complex science of positive affirmations, and why they occasionally backfire

In the world of self-help and mental well-being, positive affirmations have gained popularity. The idea behind it is simple: repeating phrases like "I am worthy" or "I choose happiness" can lead to improved happiness, reduced stress, and even better physical health. This concept is rooted in self-affirmation theory, which posits that individuals strive to maintain a sense of adequacy and worthiness.

However, life challenges such as academic failure, work mistakes, or relationship breakdowns can threaten this self-concept, leading to increased self-criticism, anxiety, depression, or even self-harm.

Research has shown that in certain situations, positive affirmations can indeed have a positive effect. A 2025 study reviewed 67 studies and found that writing or saying positive affirmations did improve participants' self-view and social connections, albeit with a relatively small impact. Other studies have shown that affirmations can help protect social media users' self-esteem and university students' mental health, as well as reduce depression and drowsiness in chemotherapy patients and improve self-esteem in those with depressive symptoms.

Despite these findings, recent studies have been unable to replicate the positive effects observed in earlier research. Therefore, it's essential to examine the potential downsides of positive affirmations. One risk is toxic positivity, which arises when people suppress or ignore negative emotions, believing that doing so will lead to an overall more positive outlook. This kind of forced positivity can cause shame, reluctance to seek help, and a poor coping mechanism.

Another concern is the potential for overreliance on positive affirmations, which can prevent individuals from acknowledging and addressing real issues in their lives. For example, maintaining a positive attitude in an abusive relationship might blind one to the dangers present, effectively keeping them trapped in an unhealthy situation. Additionally, constant positive self-talk in pursuit of constant pleasure and reward can result in an unhealthy cycle of seeking more dopamine.

Instead of focusing solely on positive affirmations, research suggests that cultivating self-compassion and creating emotional distance through third-person perspective can be more beneficial. Being compassionate with oneself, especially during stressful or challenging situations, can strengthen resilience and improve mental health.

Speaking to oneself in the third person can also provide a valuable emotional buffer, allowing for a more objective and less emotionally charged perspective on one's thoughts and feelings. Ultimately, the effectiveness of our thinking styles depends on the context and the need for flexibility rather than rigidity.