Self-compassion: How self-sympathy helps against exaggerated perfectionism

The desire to lead a better life initially sounds positive - but if it becomes a permanent obligation, it can be a burden in the long run. Those who set out to become fitter, more focused, and more balanced around the clock often risk the opposite: physical and mental exhaustion. If you then want to opt out of the self-optimization drive, you should also work on your own expectations: "It's important to admit to yourself that you don't always have to and can do everything perfectly," says Nathalie Claus, psychological psychotherapist at the Institute of Psychology at the University of Bremen.

Self-compassion instead of limitless self-optimization A helpful strategy for this: develop self-compassion and treat yourself like a good friend or a good girlfriend. The central question is: How would I comfort the friend or girlfriend if they told me that something hadn't worked out 100 percent? "The words you would choose to say to them should also be said to yourself," says Claus.

In addition, you should be very aware of not devaluing yourself. Again, it's about how you talk to yourself. For example, if the last workout was a flop, if weight loss isn't going as desired, or if you've neglected your meditation routine again, you shouldn't think "I failed." Better: "I did what was possible for me." Not least, it's crucial for a healthy relationship with yourself: learning to say no when it becomes too much. "No one needs to feel guilty about that," says Claus.