{
  "id": 142849,
  "title": "The demo for 500 FINGER FILLET taught me that none of you should let me anywhere near a kitchen knife, also can someone call a doctor",
  "url": "https://urgent.news/2026/08/04/the-demo-for-500-finger-fillet-taught-me-that-none-of-you-should-let",
  "topic": "tech",
  "section": "Tech",
  "published": "2026-08-04T18:12:32.000Z",
  "source": {
    "name": "Rock Paper Shotgun",
    "slug": "rock-paper-shotgun",
    "url": "https://www.rockpapershotgun.com/the-demo-for-500-finger-fillet-taught-me-that-none-of-you-should-let-me-anywhere-near-a-kitchen-knife-also-can-someone-call-a-doctor"
  },
  "original_language": "en",
  "account": null,
  "summary": "I have learned something about myself today: I shouldn't be allowed near kitchen utensils. This is a problem because I am the cook of the house, and yet my time with the demo for 500 FINGER FILLET proves most unanimously that I am going to cut one, maybe more, of my fingers off. It feels like an inevitability, one I can't escape from, because I did in fact cut off almost every single finger on my…",
  "key_points": [],
  "editors_take": null,
  "illustration": null,
  "coverage": {
    "outlets": 1,
    "also_reported_by": []
  },
  "ai_generated": true,
  "disclaimer": "Summaries, key points and the editor’s take are written by software from other outlets’ reporting and may contain errors — always check the linked original."
}